learning to have your own opinion

Hi angels,

I feel like lately throughout my posts and just the way I’ve been growing in general, it’s become apparent that women are in fact now taking over the world – we’re going for world domination because we’ve stayed silent for too long and now we’re burning it all down and won’t take any more of your shit. This goes for anything to do with women being silenced, suppressed or shown as unequal – we’re coming to shut you all down basically – we’ve got our war paint on and we’re ready to fight.

Because of this amazing phenomenon that has really come to light over the past couple of years (and continues to get stronger every day) I have learned that I as a woman, do not need to be the definition of ‘feminine’ in order to please others.

If I want to shave my hair off and dye my armpit hair blue, then I can. If I want to scream and shout from the rooftops and swear because I don’t give a shit that it’s deemed as being ‘unladylike’, I can.

And most importantly, something that has really allowed me to come into my own lately, is the fact that I have learned that I, as a woman, am allowed to have an opinion.

Yes, me. Little old me. Little old me who society would tell to sit down and shut up or to get back in the kitchen, little old me over here is allowed to have an opinion and most importantly, I am allowed to share my opinion. I’m allowed to exercise that right as a woman and I am allowed to tell you exactly what I think, because I will no longer be silenced. We as women, will no longer be silenced.

I will never say that I have followed society’s stereotypes as being a woman – if a time came where I needed to share my opinion or I was forced to stand up for myself, then I would, but other than that I would shy away from everything and just kind of stay quiet and unnoticed, unless called upon. I wouldn’t want to disturb the peace as it were, I wouldn’t want to cause unnecessary drama or have people dislike me because I overshared or said something unfeminine that would deem me any less in their eyes – I wanted everyone to like me.

…Until this feminist movement came along (and don’t get me wrong, I understand that this movement has been happening forever, but in recent times through social media etc. it has become a lot more prominent).

People are scared of women with opinions and a voice. They’re intimidated by it, people don’t like strong, independent women, and you know what that means?

We have to start shouting a little fucking louder.

Nowadays, if I have an opinion, I’ll say it. If I think someone is wrong or I need to share my thoughts and views on something, I don’t wait until I’m called upon, I will just say it. If someone makes a sexist remark to me, even a subconscious one (do you know how many sexist comments us women get every day that we don’t even realise are sexist?) then I will call that person out on it and I’ll correct them, or educate them on what they’re saying.

It may well make me unpopular, it may make people perceive me as a ‘man hater’ – bitter and cold, but do I give a fuck? No. I don’t hate men, I hate ignorance. I hate misogyny. I hate uneducated people who feel like their throwaway comments can simply be passed off as just that – throwaway – a joke, even. You’ll have people tell you to get a sense of humour or (my personal favourite) “wow, you must be fun at parties” – for your information yes, I am fun at parties, I’m a fucking great time. But you my friend? You’re insecure and your masculinity is about as fragile as the way you view us women.

But the truth is, we’re not fragile, we’re not vulnerable. We don’t need to be saved or for you to validate us – we weren’t put on this Earth for the sole purpose of being attractive to you. We can save ourselves and in actual fact we don’t need men at all in the grand scheme of things, if us females could find a way of reproducing without men, there’d be no need for them at all. Slowly but surely, natural selection will wipe them out as great Mother Nature works her magic.

I’m kidding, of course – feminism is about equality for everybody and not about hating men which is a very common misconception and the exact reason you’ll get immature boys turning their noses up and mocking you when you tell them you’re a feminist.

But like I said, it’s their fragile masculinity and that’s their problem. They’re the type of guys who will claim they can’t tell if another man is attractive because they’re so afraid of looking unmasculine or gay by doing so, and do we want to surround ourselves with those type of people ladies? No, so let’s forget about them and move on.

Never okay, I repeat never let your voice be silenced – if you have something to say, fucking say it, be loud, be wild, swear a little – who cares if it’s deemed ‘unfeminine’, why are we labelling ourselves like that anyway? Your opinion is just as valid as the next person’s, say what you think, don’t let people talk over you or disregard what you’ve said because of the fact you’re a woman. Call people out when they disrespect you, don’t stand down and don’t be silenced. This goes for interactions with all people, not just men – I’ve lost friends through standing my ground and I’m a lot better for it, I used to let people walk all over me and allow them to treat me like shit because I was so scared of causing upset by saying something – like I said, all I ever wanted to do was keep the peace, so I’d stay quiet and continue to let them treat me bad because I wanted to be friends, I wanted people to like me. The second I’d had enough and decided that actually, I wasn’t going to let this continue, I was going to use my voice and stand up for myself – they didn’t like it and you know what? We argued, we fell out and stopped being friends.

Am I sorry for it? No. Was it my fault? No. They just wanted people to push around and the second I decided I didn’t want to be that person for them anymore, they didn’t like it.

Don’t let anyone try to tell you who you are, like I said, it may well make me unpopular with people nowadays, I may come across as defensive, blunt, cold or snappy but honestly, I couldn’t care less. Do not mess with me. I’m exercising the right to voice my opinion more than ever and best believe I will not allow myself to be silenced again, people can be intimidated by me and make comments but I do.not.care. I won’t let people try and tell me who I am or speak for me and I definitely will not allow myself to be on the receiving end of sexist comments or throwaway remarks – my voice will be counted and it will be heard – best believe I’ll call you out on it and educate you on your ignorance, whether you want to hear it or not.

Never let anyone silence you and always make sure that your voice is heard, because you have one and you can change the world with it – we are changing the world with it. Every day, women are changing the world. We’re coming for you and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Click here to listen to some fierce, girl power ballads I like to play when I’m feeling fierce like this – support your female artists ladies ♡

I love you all so very much and remember that your voice is always welcome here, express your opinion and do not apologise about it to anyone. Never let yourself be silenced and learn to have your own opinion because it counts and it is valid, you are valid, and you always have been.

All my love,

Chloe .xx