stop taking life serious(ly)

Sometimes not everything has to have such a deep meaning and be so serious, sometimes you can just say you know what, screw it. This is what I want to do right now.

I have Pluto’s asteroid number tattooed on me, and why? Why not? It makes people curious. It makes people ask what that random number on my body is. Like, it’s the asteroid number for a planet that doesn’t even technically exist anymore – but what’s that got to do with me? Lots of things I feel like, so I had it inked on my skin. Is that weird? Probably, but in my eyes that’s all the more reason to do it.

It’s getting tattoos inspired by people that don’t even know you exist, it’s ‘kids these days’ and falling in love with things and being impacted by them even though the feeling may not last forever. Okay, but what if it does? I know myself, I know that my emotions will last for a long time, I’m not going to wake up one morning and suddenly not feel affected by something anymore. Yes I’m young, but my youth matters just as much to me as my older years will. Why do we build ourselves around our adult lives and the future? It’s not guaranteed. Some of us won’t even make it there. I could die tomorrow. Am I going to live my life here and now not doing the things I want to because well, I might not feel the same way when I’m 40?

If that was the case, we could apply that rule to everything. Why are you dating that person? You’ll probably break up in 2 years. Why are you getting married? You may regret that decision in 10 years. Why are you getting a dog? You might hate them in 2 years. Are you sure you want to shave your head like that? Are you sure that tattoo is a good idea? You might regret doing that at some point.

Yes, and?

People say how will you feel when you’re 40 with a husband and kids and you’ve still got that tattooed on you? Tattoos for me are an impression of who I was at that point in my life – what I was into, who I loved, what kind of person I was and so on. Who was I at 18? I have a tattoo for that. Who was I at 21? I have a tattoo for that, too. Even though it’s not the point here, I’ll still love all of my tattoos no matter what age I’m at, regardless.  I like to think that at 40 I’ll still be the same the same person in that sense – I’ll still love the things I’ve loved and I’ll still appreciate and adore all of them. For some reason everyone has this idea that once you reach a certain age you have to have a personality transplant and that getting older means you need to grow up. I don’t want to be a boring 40-year-old with a mortgage and greying hair ’cause my kids have stressed me out and my husband probably doesn’t even love me anymore. I’d like to think that at 40 I’ll still have the same mind as I do now, in the sense that I’m not going to look back on the things I’ve done and think, why on earth did I do that? Why did I think that was a good idea?

I’m not going to look at the art on my body and think huh…it was cute when you were 20 Chloe, but now? It just doesn’t work. Why did you do that?

I’m not going to be that person.

I’m still going to love myself, I’m still going to feel things at 100mph and fall in love with everything in the blink of an eye. I’m still going to write and create and live in my own little dream world, I’m still going to be a ‘fangirl’ (or fan ‘woman’) of artists that mean the world to me. Why does all of that have to change once my age reaches a certain number?

I’m not going to be some snooty adult looking down on the actions of a young girl. I’m the same person. I will still be the same person. The only thing that’s going to change about me is my mind, in the sense that it will continue to open and flourish and learn and educate and grow. I’m not going to have a reverse personality transplant and become a closed-minded old woman the second I’m considered “middle aged”. Who cares? Like, I’m gonna be 60 with an asteroid number tattooed on me because of a Kpop band I liked when I was 20. And? Guess what? I’m still gonna like them! Best believe I’ll be still be 60 bopping my head along to Kpop. What exactly is it that’s going to change? The members will get older and possibly split up or stop making music. And? That suddenly means I can’t enjoy the music they’ve already created and the things they’ve done? It means I can no longer like them as people just because we’ve both reached a certain age?

What even is that stigma, I don’t know, but it’s ridiculous. Who the fuck cares? Why are there rules for every age – in your mid twenties you should have found someone to settle down with so by the time you’ve reached 30 you’ll be married with a house and preparing to start a family. No? Why are we made to feel like failures because we haven’t abided by society’s invisible rules on life planning? Everyone has their own life plan, there is no right or wrong age to do something.

Why are we made to feel like we shouldn’t get tattoos for X, Y and Z because we’ll probably regret it in so many years?

You may be a cranky old woman when you’re 50 Sandra but I’m still going to be writing in journals and enjoying Kpop and probably watching teenage shows like Riverdale on Netflix.

Who are you to tell me who I will and won’t be?

I’d like to think the world isn’t going to make me cold like the rest of them and that I’ll still be the open minded, created and free spirited person that I am now. I know I will be. I know myself. I know that I’m still going to love artists and follow them on Instagram and watch Netflix and love Disney when I’m however old, because times are changing and I refuse to grow up. I refuse to sacrifice the person I am and always will be just because society says I have to act a certain way depending on my age. Screw that.

I’m still going to be 50 strolling around Disneyland believing in magic and wearing my Minnie Mouse ears, I’m not going to regret the tattoos I got for artists I loved when I was 20 because guess what, I’m still going to love them when I’m 50! Shock horror.

I’ve noticed that when I explain tattoos my to people, I don’t explain them but rather, try and justify them – I make excuses and tell them “I know it’s silly, but…” and then afterwards I sit to myself and think, why did I do that? Why did I just try and justify something so personal to me, like it’s anyone else’s business anyway? I don’t know. Because I feel like I have to make excuses for myself maybe – it’s a confidence thing and something to do with being a woman where I’m made to feel like I take up too much space and have to say sorry for everything , which then transfers into other parts of my life too like, for example, the ink on my skin.

~

15/02/19

I think I just got to a point where I was like “these are the things that I love and these are the things I want on my body” because there’s always this voice in the back of your head like “don’t go crazy don’t do anything stupid don’t get covered don’t cover yourself in things you can’t remove” but when I really thought about it that was always the voice of other people and ‘society’ I guess – when I really thought about it that voice wasn’t actually me. I wasn’t telling myself not to do it, I wanted myself to do it because I was happy. I was happy for myself that I’d found this outlet and a way to express myself and make my body look pretty and showcase the things I love, I wanted to cover my skin with art and beautiful, nice things that make me who I am and I think I always have to remember that whenever I have an idea and think “wait no, what if that’s not a good idea” because it is. It’s you, Chloe. You know it is.

~

Like the journal entry I wrote a few months ago, I’m now just at a point in life where, if I want to do something that shows my love for something or someone, I’m going to. I’m going to write about it and listen to it and buy signed versions of it and tattoo it and yada yada. I’m going to do it because I love it and it’s me. I’m sick of being made to feel like I have to second guess everything just because. Because what, because you personally wouldn’t do it? Isn’t that the whole point of…individuality? The fact that we all think differently and love different things and want to do different things? Isn’t that the point of life? The point of even having names? The fact that we all have a different name and face and identity? Isn’t that the point?

I don’t know where this post is going but I’ve had this in drafts for a while now and wanted to wait until I got this tattoo before I posted it so, here it is. I see too many people getting bashed for doing the things they love and there’s this whole stigma around what’s “acceptable” (aka ‘cool’) and “unacceptable” (aka, ‘not cool’) to like. I’m here just to say that you can like whatever the fuck you want and if it makes you happy then, it’s no one else’s business.

Society is a social construct and you don’t have to abide by its ‘rules’ that were literally created by people trying to impress other people that couldn’t give two shits about them anyway. You know what I’m talking about. This life is for you and no one else, so do what you want to do and, as long as it’s harming no one else, keep doing it until you don’t want to anymore, then, find the next thing you love and do that instead.

Like I said 2 years ago when I wrote this post, don’t stay in the box they put you in. Don’t let them label you for their own convenience.

You were born to be different, and different you shall be.

All my love,

Chloe .xx

24 thoughts on “stop taking life serious(ly)

  1. chloeburford says:

    Omg I love this so much, it is such an empowering post!! So many people take life so freaking seriously, I have a heart tattood on my finger with absolutely no meaning, I got it cause its cool. But so many people say how i will regret it on my wedding day or when I am older. But its like fuck it? If I want it then I will get it. I love how confident you are in this post, you are slaying!! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chloe Luna says:

      Ahh how have I only just seen this?! So sorry angel !! Thank you so much for your wonderful words as always and I completely agree with everything you said. So much love for you!! xx

      Like

  2. hiddenzzzzz says:

    This post left me speechless. It is everything I had in mind, everything I wanted my family and people around me to understand. I believe that I’ll be the same even after 100 years, no I want to be the same.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ☾Adria☽ says:

    Chloe! I was mentally yelling ‘YES!” the entire time I read this. Do whatever the hell you want to do, nothing’s guaranteed in life. Screw a label, screw conforming to social constructs, you were not made to fit into the mould other people create for you!! Who actually cares? 40 something year old me will still yell about cake and the stuff I care about from metaphorical rooftops. Maybe I’ll cringe a little. Or maybe I won’t and I’ll still be dancing to Beyonce on a Saturday morning in a shirt 4 sizes too big and my hair in a messy bun. Sometimes I want to scream the words “I was not born to please you”. Dudeeeee you only live once. If you want to cover every inch of you in art then do it. If you want to dye your hair blue then do it. If you want to travel to a foreign country you didn’t even know existed until two minutes ago, DO ITTTTT. Love this and you so so much💙PS: This entire comment felt like an ad for Nike😂🙈

    Liked by 3 people

    • Chloe Luna says:

      Ahhhh YES. I pray you’re still Adria at the end of all of this 💙 I know that you will be. Never lose that. You’re way too special to ever let your light dim out, I hope the world never does that to you. I lovelovelove this comment !! 💙xxx
      p.s. Shia LaBeouf is that you? 👀

      Like

  4. beforetheclockstrikes12 says:

    “I don’t want to be a boring 40-year-old with a mortgage and greying hair ’cause my kids have stressed me out and my husband probably doesn’t even love me anymore.” Well… gahdamn.

    Great post as always Chlo. I had to start this comment off with that quote coz that was quite the plot twist. I was reading along and going “damn right Chlo! You tell them,” then that part came and I wasn’t like 😨. I was shooketh lol.

    Such a great post. You are right. You should not have to defend who you are or explain why you are the way you are. I am so intrigued by your tattoos for example. From afar, someone can see your interests and what you have been through in life. I also love how passionate you are about things, especially Kpop. I wish I had passion for things… other than, you know, threatening suicide and never going through with it 🤔

    Fun fact about me that most people do not know: the High School Musical trilogy is three of my favorite movies of all time. No joke. I remember being embarrassed by this, but I have been proudly telling people this for years now. I am a 24 year old black man who sings along and dances along to High School Musical. These things make us who we are, and they will continue to define us as we age.

    Thank you for writing this. It was very beautiful. Sending you all my best xx

    P.s. do you mind that I actually call you “Chlo” and not “Chloe?” I know that some people do not like the names I call them haha.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Chloe Luna says:

      HAHAHAHA. too much? I feel like I know too many people in that situation…I refuse to be next!

      “I wish I had passion for things… other than, you know, threatening suicide and never going through with it” I read that while I was at work and had to come up with an excuse for why I was laughing so hard HAHAHA. The joys of depression !! I feel you waaay too much on that one, like really, what else are we good at other than that?? You have to laugh at these things.

      I love High School Musical !! God bless you for sharing that with me ’cause hell yes, who doesn’t love that franchise. Anyone who says HSM isn’t one of the best things to come out of absolutely anything ever is in denial. Which one is your fave?? I think 2 is mine since it was nicely in the middle, the story was already established and we weren’t at the end yet, plus, the songs were FIRE. Like seriously. The first dance at my wedding will be I Don’t Dance. I’m telling you. 3 was the best movie in terms of quality but it makes me depressed since it was the last one and they’re all graduating and leaving each other and I don’t need that sort of negativity in my life.

      Thank you for reading this and loving it hehe, sending you all my best 10x back .xx (I’m just going to keep stealing your ending lines in my follow up comments now, it’s a thing).

      P.S. call me what you want !! hahaha, Chlo is absolutely fine 💙 it’s what most people use x

      Liked by 1 person

      • beforetheclockstrikes12 says:

        Haha nah it was not too much. It was surprising but funny as well… I know that sort of thing is not meant to be funny… I am just digging myself a bigger hole for myself at this point.

        Haha you are right! Sometimes all I can do is just laugh at my depression in order to deal with it. Also, sometimes it is because my tears ran out… Hey look behind you! It is Matt Damon! (hopefully you actually turned around so I could make my escape from this depressing and frankly embarrassing monologue).

        Hahaha everyone loves HSM. You are right! If people say they do not like it, they are lying. In the 6th grade my parents even bought me an HSM duvet and matching pillowcases hahaha… oh man. If I had to pick a favorite, I would probably say HSM 1, mainly because I know the songs more than I do from the other ones and I have seen it multiple times. Also, the story may be cliche but the themes of acceptance and self love, friendship, teamwork and believing in yourself resonated with me, especially at that early of an age.

        The second one is also brilliant. I forced my dad to buy me the DVD and I even scratched it because I kept watching the “Work It Out” scene hahahaha. When I moved to Zambia in December 2008 for High School, HSM 3 was still in the cinema there. It was the first movie I ever watched at the cinema in Zambia, so it holds a special memory for me. I really like it but I have only watched it fully once because it is the final movie, and my heart can not take that heartbreak.

        The HSM Trilogy is a huge inspiration for me. Truly. It was a major inspiration for me to actually take part in 3 musicals during my time in High School and I enjoyed every minute of all three musicals.

        Ha! You can take my end line. Funny enough, I have nothing inspirational or motivational to say at the end of comments, so I just settled for that. I think it sounds so generic haha but I am glad you like it.

        Wishing you all the best Chlo xx

        Liked by 1 person

  5. seaofwordsx says:

    Such an amazing and inspiring post! 💗✨ I so agree with you hell yeah! We can love anything we want and be who we wanna be at any age. I also sometimes felt anxious and sad about growing up because I thought I have to act a certain way and can not like the things I love now. I’m happy that that isn’t true. It’s just what society tells us. I will be a Summer girl and hippie girl forever. I will still wear a flower headband, colourful bracelets, hippie clothes and have long hair as it’s my identity and I don’t want to change that for anybody or anything. We can be who we wanna be at any age. I’m happy you are also that way and you don’t let society in the way. We are much more than that. I will see you on a Kpop concert and still blogging about everything you love. Yesss you go girl! I love you so much 💗

    Liked by 2 people

    • Chloe Luna says:

      Thank you angel !! 💞 I love this comment so much hehe. yes yes yes to all of that !! Amen. We’ll still always be us at the end of the day (and yes you definitely will still see me at Kpop concerts and blogging about everything I love hahaha), love you so much more✨ xxx

      Liked by 1 person

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