I’M 23, BABY

Hello my loves,

It’s my birthday! And I can’t lie, I kind of forgot about it and writing this entire post until yesterday HA. Mainly because this birthday isn’t anything significant and I’m not one those people that really hypes their birthday up anyway – possibly an unpopular opinion but I cannot stand people who keep reminding you of their upcoming birthday every 2 seconds and will find a way to turn the conversation in the direction of them and their birthday for the 3 months before and until the actual date. You could literally be talking about a funeral and they’ll be like “Wow and speaking of death, does anyone know I was born 20 years ago this month?!” like okay Sally we get it, pipe down.

ANYWAY

I have nothing to say about it really other than the fact that I always do a birthday post just to document it each year I guess, and I might also do a what I got for my birthday post like I’ve done before but we’ll see. This year is of course different to any other year for obvious reasons, and this will be my first “COVID birthday” as of course last January we weren’t in a pandemic and could actually go out and live a normal life. Was that last year or a million years ago?? No one knows. Time has lost all meaning. Every day is the same.

I’m spending my day at work which isn’t something I normally do, but the thought of sitting at home all day and doing nothing makes me want to bang my head against the wall so, at least at work I can have some social interaction ’cause you know, you can’t get it anywhere else these days! I’ve forgotten what it’s like to properly speak to another human being. I don’t feel 23 at all and I won’t lie it does kind of freak me out a bit because it does feel like this is it and there’s no going back now…I feel like 23 is the age where you can’t get away with not classing yourself as an adult anymore. Like, 22? Yeah, you’re still young. 23? You’re a whole adult now (no thank you !!) I still feel 16 on the inside and I don’t like growing up and getting older, I feel like I’ve already reached the age where I’m starting to resent birthdays – please send help. I’m old as hell.

One thing I will say though is that I’m in a much better place than I was last year with my birthday – last year I spent my birthday dinner crying in the middle of a restaurant because I felt so spaced out and sad I just wanted to be by myself all day and hide, and the year before that wasn’t too much better, 21 made me feel like having a breakdown. This year however? I’m good. I’m all good. I’m very proud of myself for how far I’ve come, I put on a really nice outfit and did my hair and makeup, and today I love myself and I’m okay with being 23. I’m okay with being me today, and I hope the same for every day to come after that.

And that’s all I have to say I guess! Also kind of sad I’ve gone past the stage of ‘milestone’ birthdays now, as after 21 there’s just…nothing. At least for 22 I could sing Taylor Swift all day – nobody likes you when you’re 23 I guess.

All my love,

Chloe .xx

34 thoughts on “I’M 23, BABY

  1. chloeburford says:

    Happy belated birthday lovely lady!!! I had a lockdown birthday last year and remember is being such a weird day as I worked from home and had to keep reminding myself throughout the day that it was my birthday! I am so glad to hear that this year you are in a much better place, it is so nice to reflect back to a year or two ago and see how much has improved. You are so so strong!! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chloe Luna says:

      Thank you so much lovely! Yes it’s super weird right, it really doesn’t feel like a birthday at all, more like just any other day since everyday is the same now! Thank you for your lovely words and for being so kind as always angel, hope you and baby Poppy are well xxx

      Like

  2. reindeershermaine says:

    happy belated birthday queeeeennn. i get where you’re going, i never make a fuss out of my birthday too. in fact, i think i give off the impression that i don’t care about it at all (deep down i do though), and yes! every day feels the same right now, and it scares tf outta me. i love your vibe so much, and i hope you had an amazing birthday. the world is lucky to have you. โค

    Liked by 2 people

  3. seaofwordsx says:

    Happy birthday lovely Chloe! ๐ŸŽ‚๐Ÿ˜˜๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽŠโœจ๐ŸŽˆ I’m sorry if I’m late but I’m not blogging anymore since months. I’m doing very badly, anxiety and depression… I’m getting help but it’s really dark all these months. I’m happy you are doing well. I hope you had a great day despite lockdown. I wish you loads of love, luck and happiness always. I can understand having breakdowns on birthdays because I also have them. Love you โค๏ธ

    Liked by 2 people

    • Chloe Luna says:

      Thank you so much angel! I have been thinking about you a lot actually since I noticed your absence and wondered what had happened, I checked your Instagrams and saw you hadn’t posted and I was going to message you but didn’t know if you were still using the accounts. I’m so sorry you’re going through this and you know I’m always here for you whenever you need me ๐Ÿ’ž you have nothing to apologise for. I love you so much xxxx

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Hannah says:

    Happy Birthday Chloe! As someone who has just turned 24 (I still consider myself 23 not going to lie because my birthday did not really feel like a birthday), I can tell you that 23 was probably one of the best years of my life (if you ignore the pandemic) and I am optimistic that it is going to be just as good for you! xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hilary Tan says:

    I can’t help but wonder if that unicorn party was your party, because if it was, then you are incredibly lucky AND why wasn’t I invited to that party?? It looks amazing! โค

    Happy [belated] birthday, Chloe! I hope you had a wonderful birthday and it was still a blast despite the ongoing pandemic. I think that 23 is young. Imagine turning 30! That will be my sad reality this summer and I am so not looking forward to my birthday. I wish I could be 23 again ๐Ÿค—

    Liked by 1 person

  6. 50shad3s0fjay says:

    Oh my gosh – love the blink 182 reference ๐Ÿ˜‚ but itโ€™s not true because I like youuuyyy! And hey – flip it round – 30 is a milestone birthday!!! Thereโ€™s lots of good to come! Iโ€™ve come to realise now Iโ€™m 26 that age doesnโ€™t actually matter all that much, you can still be free to enjoy life. I think that comes from living for yourself too rather than other people. If youโ€™re happy then youโ€™re happy, doesnโ€™t matter what age you are, what youโ€™ve achieved by this age or whatever, none of that timeline shit matters because youโ€™re happy! Anyway, happy birthday beautiful darling!! Iโ€™m so happy youโ€™re feeling good today, and may this be your first and only covid birthday and next year for your 24th you can celebrate in style!! Love you โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chloe Luna says:

      Hahaha I’m glad someone got it! That’s very true, though I suspect when I get to 30 I’ll have some kind of breakdown hahahaha. Thank you so much for your lovely words as always and you’re right – you’re only as old as you feel! Age can’t label or define me in that way ๐Ÿ’ž love you too angel !! Hope you’re well xxx

      Like

  7. Kojo says:

    Happy Birthday!

    You are 23! Gosh, the years seem to fly by, don’t they? You survived another year of life, and while a pandemic was unfolding, no less. You are so strong, although you may not think so. I am so proud of you and everything you have accomplished. I can not wait to see what your 23rd year on this planet has in store for you.

    You are right though, after certain birthdays there aren’t any milestones anymore. you mentioned Taylor Swift’s 22 and have been thinking of other songs that mention birthdays but drew a blank. They only thing that comes to mind is Halsey on her song ‘Colors’ where she says: “I hope you make it to the day you’re 28 years old” (side note: that is probably my favourite Halsey song, and the music video is great. THAT is how you do a plot twist).

    I am so sorry about you crying at your birthday dinner last year. I hope this birthday is kinder on you. You are loved, Chlo. Don’t forget that. Thinking of you xx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chloe Luna says:

      I’m old Kojo !! Help hahaha. Where did the time go! I forgot about that Halsey lyric omg, it’s a good one! *marks down on phone notes to use that on my 28th* – my favourite Halsey song is Trouble! But those songs are generally all from the same era because well…it was the best, right? Thank you so much for your lovely words as always Kojo โค๏ธ Thinking of you too, of course – always .xx

      Liked by 1 person

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