deep

2:37am

Last night I stumbled across this piece of paper crumpled in the bottom of a clothing drawer and thought I’d share. I was 17.

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02/04/15

I need to accept myself. I need to stop comparing myself to everyone else. Quit that. I need to stop second guessing everything I do, I end up just talking myself out of it and once again not being who I really am. This is me. I’m 17 and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing but that’s okay ’cause I still have so many more things ahead of me and so much time and I’m gonna be okay. I’m gonna stay nice and do everything for myself, be myself because I am enough and anyone who doesn’t see that can fuck off. Be myself and don’t compare myself to others because I’m not them, I’m me. And I’m okay with that.

18 thoughts on “2:37am

  1. I love finding snippets of things I thought or wrote at a specific time in my life. Such a beautiful and important message your 17 year old self wrote here, wow. “I am enough and anyone who can’t see that can fuck off” – YES! People make us feel inadequate all the time, like we are less than everyone else. To have that inner strength to go “you know what? I AM enough. I deserve to be treated as such.” is such a rare thing nowadays and takes some people their whole lives to realise. Ps. Your handwriting is so pretty xx

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    1. There was definitely a more elegant way I could have put it but in an empowered 3am state I suppose that was the last thing on my mind hahaha, also my handwriting is not pretty !! 🙈 I can definitely do better than this hahaha it’s a mess. Thank you so much for your wonderful words as always though, I appreciate them so much!! xxx

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  2. Wow that’s amazing that you stumbled across this! I moved country so it doesn’t happen very often that I find old notes to myself but I think it’s so important to write to yourself because finding them in the future is like a little glimpse into the past.
    This is a really sweet reminder too. Your life is your own and the more time you spend comparing yourself to others the more time you take away from your own life

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    1. It’s not often I find old notes to myself either as I usually keep all of my writing in one place so I was surprised when I came across this! It really is important to self-reflect and write to yourself, it’s something I always make a conscious effort to do .xx

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    1. Hahaha from what I can tell it was just a rage fuelled 3am scribble but thank you! Good question as well, but also a tough one! Yes and no. Age has done the world of good for me and so growing older I’m definitely more in control of things than I was before but at the same time, I still suffer with my mental illnesses and so on that side of things I’m still the same. It’s bittersweet .xx

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      1. I feel the same. Age has allowed me to become happier and more content with my life but there are still times when I fall into as deep a depression as I used to when I was 15 and it is at times like that that I feel like I have not grown at all. But the times are getting less frequent and I hope they will for you too. xx

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  3. You are the biggest inspiration ever, you are so so strong. I love reflecting back on what I have written years ago too and I relate to you so much. Your writing is so beautiful, as always xxx

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  4. Wow this is so beautiful! 😍 It’s amazing that you found it again. I love those notes so much. I also wrote a lot when I was younger in my diary. It’s nice to look back and see how we grew. Your words are so right and I’m still in that space sometimes to compare myself to others. I love myself more than in the past but self love and accepting yourself takes time. Being bullied myself made me have a low self esteem so it takes time to build it up again. I love you words, your handwriting and everything. You are amazing Chloe and yes you are enough. I love you so much 💕

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    1. Thank you so much 💞 I completely agree, I love myself more than I used to but it’s definitely still an ongoing battle, I still struggle with it a lot. Love you so much more angel girl, thank you for your continued support as always. I appreciate it so much xxx

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